Edge

Is where i stand now.

Somebody just push me off.
To fall as fast as i could.
So i wouldn't feel much pain
When i realise i'm already gone.






Who is in the wrong gnorw eht ni si ohw

I'm Not Ok. Not Alright.

"I MAY NOT NEED TO WAIT FOR YOU TO FINISH NS."

Thanks. I shall remember it.

I Shouldn't Think Highly Of Myself.
WAKE UP.

Time won't stop, So are the troubles.

Hi Blog.

Today went out with Meiwern. Thought we will actually enjoy myself but ended up bad again. I felt that we always has ups and downs within a week. Last 2 days we did enjoy ourself, but today we ended up quarrel again.

I kinda wonder, is it because we can't meet up often cause we will ended up quarrel for the week. She always say I need to change or I never change. Well, seriously, I really change alot. I'm not used to be like this in the past. And for awhile, I finally realise what was the thing i should change. I should just change myself to accept what she was. Since she always says that she doesn't want to change, then that's the only option I will have to take.

But isn't accept her means i have to bear her everything? Then i'll be like a balloon keep taking in the unwanted things that she will give me and ended up what we are now. I don't know. I took alot of craps that she gave me already and there are really times that I feel like punching on the walls just to vent my anger. I control, I really did control. She says my temper is bad when i did this, but have she wonder how come I will ended up in this way? Let's just forget about that.

I just hope everything will just go smoothly for me. I love her so much. Really.






So Eugene, Just Accept Her.





Yes.





I will.





I Need A Hug.

Testing That Is This Blog Being Close?

1 2 3..................................................................................

Haha. I'm Blind.

So many things in my head. Its about to explode.

So who's the real me? Nobody knows. Even I don't understand. Sometimes I lose myself. I lose control. People see me as crazy? Partner is embarassed to have me? That's not I need anyway. Everytime a serious relationship never get to last. Is it I'm not fated to have one? Or should I really have to act like a jerk then it will be ok?

My head is swollen. I guess there's blood.

Anyway I am contented. For what I have now. Other things, will have to wait and see. Lets nature take its course. Seriously, I really think that the outcome will be the same. Its so similar to what i experience in the past. Will we be together? I guess you will just find somebody better than me. I say this is to make who feel better? Me or you? If I ever told you I really love you only, will you believe? If I told you, you are the only person I wanna live with, will you believe? If i told you, i will change, will you believe?

Crying Makes my life worsen.

Suck it up Eugene,
It's the same old scene.

This Chinese New Year its really not for me. It's boring, it's really not that happening after all. Everything just pass as per normal. Not really much mood to celebrate. Is it NS or is it everybody changing, who knows who cares. My birthday was the worst of everything. I have to book in, i was rushing, really not enough sleep. The most important thing was i didn't even enjoy just for a normal day. Hated my life.

I haven't been really lucky after.

Today is a bad day for me. Unlimited bad things just waiting for me to uncover, one by one make me sad. First, how can i be so that sway, have to do guard duty again after i pitiful completed 3. And the worst of all is during my block leave. Fuck, just don't let me enjoy at all. I really felt very down and angry. What's the worst was, there's this motherfucker, that laughed at me. Yeah, I'm that sway, but is that the permission for you to laugh at? Is not the first time bro, you have been laughing at me at Friday when i pathetically doing duty while others having half day off. This sucks and i gotta put an end to it.

But who can I depend on when I'm down?

From 08 to 09, thought it will be better in time.

Quarrel never ever stop. Quarrel over a ez-link card. Is it worth it to get both party to be angry with each other. I really Had Enough. It's not first time, it's not any last time. It's my fault, but its really a small matter. I know, probably I will get feedback that "Oh, you are just a guy, you wont know." But when you really think bout it, is it really worth to make a big whoo ha on it? I know you are angry with me for not listening to you but does this matter really important that it can really prove I will never listen to you anymore? And, have you really ever listen to me that is a surprise for me that my mama change me card?

Just when i thought things gonna be better tomorrow or tonight, guess I just think too much.

I am sorry for everything. Today it's really a bad day for me. Maybe I still sad bout my birthday. Or luck is just not with me this year, I am really tired.



Started trying to cheer up
Ended trying to keep it up