I am Troubled. I really dont know what she wants. i really had enough. i did follow advice, i did what i should, why she still have to treat me like this. hais.

I waited for so many days, finally she's back home. but the first thing she said was going for her class bbq. What the fuck rite? who wont feel fuck when something happen like this. seriously this really makes me sad rather than fuck. Nvm, i did what i did, i didnt hide the pain i did voice it out. but its not like i saying this to let u say to meet me rather than going. but is just to let u know. why must i always need to spell it out for u then u know. in fact i already no mood to go out at all since what u said at first. ok, then i already give in. what she want i do. and i just went to the party, is tt wrong? i mean, there's nothing rite, what's wrong. she say me its ok, i take it already.

then i just joke this guy that guy, and what happens, she angry me. why? cause she had enough of anger at home then she nv told me i wont cast tis joke rite? then call me small gas ghost. what the fuck i did? she should tell me problems what, aint couples should be open to each other. i already did my part, where's hers? then talk bout nasty things. then what you do to pamper me? its been already so long, have you really take a photo with me? always fren say this u do, sounds familiar? ya rite, u say me before but now who's doing it? i really work hard now, for who? for myself? for my family? not even a cent. rite now i only spend 11.50 for 4 fucking days. and y cant i survive without work. but no, i still have to feed her. so how to i get extra cash? work of course. and what i get, quarrel. i already suffer lots of shit in job, i take it bitterly. but why u still treat me like this? why? what happen to this relationship.

what past is in the past. right now, my heart belongs to you. if you wanna dig it out to prove what i said, then go ahead. i wont fudge. i only ask for friendship, i hope you understand. everything else, i only love you. i being honest, i never even lie. isnt being this is a criteria of a perfect guy? i am so tired. i trust u but can u trust me?

it easier to said then done
it easier to cry then smile
it easier to believe then explain

i just want you to be with me at least im asking for this lifetime,
i love you lim mei wern forever and ever 1 and only dear.
be my love?