Friday,

stuck home, singing along with my limp bizkit tracks man. awesome band.

heavy rain. wash away my mood of the day. everything went quite well in the morning. never late for my class, people offer to do projects with me. not bad actually. then no teacher for my make up test that my fren was saying. went to library with kahmeng and watch soccer. met william and went to grandlink. play for sometime then went to bugis discover shit has injected to my life. ok, i heard wrongly the interview place was at shaw tower or the person just dint talk properly at all. then another poor communication with mei wern that went hay wired. and everything else i just keep it to myself. no use or there's no need to say it out.



sometimes i ask myself. what's better, to care or fuck care? fuck care is of course better as in no quarrel and will be happier. but tis will make me prepare for her to leave me and will only get used to life without love. to care, there will be quarrel and each of us just wont be happy. dont ask me to balance or what, i just cant. it wasnt my decision of letting you go, it was your decision all along. but i will know what to do and wont put you in difficult spot. and as for me, i just feel that less quarrel will be better and to see you happy, i do anything. people say i should go with you and things will happen, although i have the same view but i always lie to myself its going to be alrite. and if i go maybe there will be constrict and wont be a enjoyable experience for you. so lets do what we should do. and its not the trust or anything, guys are cb, i just know, you said its gonna be alrite, but i know it sure will come up with somethings. maybe i have not been there before but i just know. but whatever, since you already went and i'm already sad, lets just slot this file into the back of my head.

i hide the feelings to prevent us from quarelling.

so i on my way,
i leave today,
if i get away,
it'll be ok.

trust isnt the way to love,
its a excuse for freedom.

you dress to kill,
would you love me still?